Famous. Last. Words.

These days, when I feel an “I’ll never…” coming to the surface, I actually try to shove it back down my throat before it escapes my lips. And yet, sometimes I can’t stop it. And then I usually live to regret it.

• I’ll never use a pacifier. Check. To take it further, I’m actually depressed My daughter F won’t use one.
• I’ll never let my kid have a bottle in their crib. Check.
• I’ll never take my kid out in pjs. Check. Check.
• I’ll never have a tv in my car. Check.
• Abridged to: I’ll never use the tv in my car, except on road trips. Check.
• Abridged to: I’ll never use the tv in my car on short drives unless its an emergency. Check.
• I’ll never let my kid crawl in bed with us. Check. Yeah, right. At 3am, you’ll do anything to go back to sleep.
• I’ll never let my kids eat processed foods. Check.
• I’ll never use a leash…

I actually haven’t done this YET but I’m assuming because I have very smugly said I wouldn’t, it might happen despite my strong belief that if your preschooler doesn’t listen or you can’t strap your baby or toddler into a stroller, it might not be a time to take them to, say, the fair. Again, I’m waiting. I’m sure a leash is in my future.

Every time I’ve dropped an “I’ll never”, confident in my conviction to these principles (if you can call them that), I’ve had the wind knocked out of my sails. It’s true that as a mom, you will be humbled and brought to your knees, over and over and over again. And in the end, sometimes over some things, you just have to take the path of least resistance and sacrifice the battle to win the war.

After all, what is motherhood (besides the most amazing gift) if not the most humbling experience? You will be ego-checked, and you can bank on that. I mean, I’m just getting started and the number of humbling experiences? Too many to count. I’m not saying I don’t have my convictions or that I’m not committed to them, I’m just saying these days, they have nothing to do with pajamas in public.